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Affairs
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The charm is the glue to keep you stuck to him
29 Nov 2011 by Rod Smith / No Comments
“I have discovered I am one of at least three woman involved with the same man. And we ALL love him and thought we were the only one. And he is married. Please help.” (Edited from a LONG letter)
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I responded to an electronic invitation I thought was from my lover and my response went to her cell phone
21 Nov 2011 by Rod Smith / 1 Comment
“My 15-year affair was discovered accidently by his wife. I responded to an electronic invitation I thought was from my lover and my response went to her cell phone. I never would have wanted this. I disabled my Facebook account after he called distraught. I have worked very hard to never be discovered. I never wanted to take him from wife and children.
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While you are his pawn you will never find love or worth
15 Nov 2011 by Rod Smith / No Comments
“I am with a man I have known years. A year ago he was involved with another woman who was already living with another man. He chose her over me when I confronted them together. Within two days he had moved back in with me after living near her for a year. Since then he has treated me poorly but has not seen her. I doubt seriously that he loves me. He is not that sexually interested in me as I think he was in her. To me, that means he is still interested in her. I think he is here for his convenience. What should I do?”
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Do you love yourself in a healthy way?
24 Oct 2011 by Rod Smith / No Comments
Healthy self love underpins all authentic love.
The evidence of a lack of healthy self love within any person will permeate all his or her relationships.
A person who does not love himself or herself in a healthy manner will:
1. Believe he or she can love another into desired change. (“I will love him out of his ….”)
2. Lose herself or himself to a relationship. (“There’s no ‘me’ anymore, I love her so much.”)
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Resist blaming the victim, yet, until the victim takes some responsibility……..
21 Aug 2011 by Rod Smith / No Comments
It’s easy to play judge. It’s easy to wonder at people who stay in destructive relationships. The patterns, to the outsider, are obvious.
Yet, the man who is with an alcoholic, ranting wife, or the woman who lives with a chronic womanizer, seems to be oblivious to the fact that things do not have to stay as they are.
He or she seems unaware that, at least in some manner, it is also the issue of the person who allows destruction to continue.
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Get Rod on FaceBook and/or Twitter
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Verbal log-jam
When I was a boy I’d endlessly practice the fluent delivery of my name but it seldom flowed easily from my lips. As if it was new news to me, adults pointed out my stutter. Perhaps they thought I was beginning, at that precise moment, for the first time in my life to spit from the mouth, twist at the neck, jig my head back and forth trying to expel some inane statement log-jammed between my gut and my throat.
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Life in our beloved 122
If the inside of a house (outside, too, I suppose) is a metaphor of the lives of the people who live in it – which is something I once read somewhere – gosh, are we in trouble. Our house is a mess.
I consistently clean it room by room, thinking often of the legend that the Golden Gate Bridge that says there’s some guy constantly painting it. I feel for him. While I am sure the view is wonderful I must believe that the poor guy whose doing it daily from one end to the other must find the wind and the weather quite a challenge.
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Being a white South African can come with complications
Being a white South African reared under Apartheid is no simple matter. It permeated everything for me. While I do not pretend to have been a political activist, I was always cognizant that my privileges, simply a result of being born white, were unmerited, and most unfair especially when enjoyed at the expense of others who were not. I think this unsettling truth (for I took advantage of my station in life) was somewhat of a companion to me from the age of about six or seven.
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Location, location – remembering winter in August
We live very close to our school and church, so close we can hear the school bell from our kitchen and the church bells in my bedroom.
Sometimes we walk to both and we don’t see the car for days.
I like it. I like not having to get in and out of the car. I like not having to negotiate traffic, something as synonymous with life in the USA as Disney, Fast Food, and the Fourth of July.
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Ready to adopt?
If you wait until you are ready to adopt a child you never will because you will never be ready. The baby, and only the baby, will make you ready. Reading the right books will be helpful, but “ready” magically comes upon you when a real baby is sleeping in your arms or crying in the middle of the night. If you are not ready to change diapers – and I always am amused at the big deal about this non-issue – being unprepared will last only as long as a clean diaper.
Life inside the Smith household
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